The other day, I asked everyone to use their combined psychic powers to assist me in getting something I want. The something is a new place, and I want it about as badly as I wanted the place we’re in now (and if you remember, I wanted this place so badly that it made me want to hurl). We’re only about 50% of the way there so far; we’ve been approved without conditions, but I need the property manager to call me back. I called them around 4pm their time yesterday (and 4:30, and 4:45, and so did the approval company), but had to leave a voicemail and this makes me hugely nervous that someone else already got it. Or will get it by Monday, which is when they wanted it rented and all because someone wasn’t in or answering the phone. How nervous is hugely nervous? In addition to the previously mentioned need to hurl, there’s a tingling in my b-hole that feels like terrified diarrhea. That is how nervous I am.

I think that the voicemail won’t do any good, and the place is already taken, and I have to start looking all over again or get a place that’s smaller and more expensive in a different neighborhood, and maybe I used up all my luck when I got this place last year.

So please continue to psychically power up, friends. The sooner we get this place, the sooner I can stop walking around with this look on my face like I’ve got to find a bathroom, like, five minutes ago. Once I get this small part of moving squared away, I can start worrying about everything else, such as how I’m going to get this place packed, how I’m going to sell all this stuff, and how I’m going to deal with these cats in my car and truthfully I have never sedated a cat before but I’m sure I can probably handle it.

I’ve already taken care of some stuff. I gave notice at my job, which felt like four giant boulders being lifted off my shoulders. I gave notice to our current landlord, who very graciously provided us with a good reference for what is hopefully (nerves, hurling, tingles in my b-hole) our new place. I’ve made a list of things to take and things to get rid of, and I’m waking up and going to sleep every day with the knowledge that all of this is going to end soon.

Until then, tingles.

About erineph

I'm Erin. I have tattoos and more than one cat. I am an office drone, a music writer, and an erstwhile bartender. I am a cook in the bedroom and a whore in the kitchen. Things I enjoy include but are not limited to zombies, burritos, Cthulhu, Kurt Vonnegut, Keith Richards, accordions, perfumery, and wearing fat pants in the privacy of my own home.
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3 Responses to Tingles

  1. Carmen says:

    Clearly, you’re taking care of business. You’re approaching this move like you approach your job, addressing every detail and leaving no stone unturned How is your boyfriend handling the pending move?

    • erineph says:

      He’s naturally less of a worrier than me, but by this time, at least he’s learned that when I have the need to vent about how worried I am, saying something like “I don’t know what to tell you” is NOT a good idea. So that’s good.

  2. Carmen says:

    Someone I know has been full of angst for the longest time about whether he should leave California after 30+ years and move back to the Midwest to be closer to family. I tell him that if he’s looking for a 100% guarantee from the Universe that he isn’t making a mistake, or that things won’t be rough at some point, the Universe can’t provide that. I told him that, basically, it comes down to this: Do you truly want/need the experience of change —- the ups, the downs….the good, bad, and the ugly? Most people know when it’s time to hit the reset button on their lives but they talk themselves out of it……and end up drinking and self-medicating a lot.

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