Did you know that you’re not supposed to like Oasis? It’s apparently lame, like this mainstream band from the ‘90s that wanted to sound like the Beatles and eventually broke up because of the tantrums thrown between the two main brother-members isn’t cool enough or whatever, and everyone’s allowed to roll their eyes at you when you mention the band, their songs, or either Gallagher.

To this, I say FUCK EVERYONE. Oasis is cool.

My main memory of Oasis was going to Marie’s house every morning before school and watching part of the MTV countdown, which I thought was really cool because I didn’t have cable and this is back when MTV occasionally played music. Either “Wonderwall” or “Champagne Supernova” was always on it, as was Fiona Apple’s “Criminal” and Hanson’s “MMMMBop,” which I thought was really funny at the time. Yeah, sorry. I don’t know about myself sometimes. After this, Oasis kind of fell out of my consciousness. Not because I didn’t like them, but because I was an American living in the middle of the country and our radio stations didn’t play much of anything beyond “(What’s The Story) Morning Glory?” I was aware of a few Oasis songs after that and liked them, but I wasn’t really a fan because I think you have to like something at least a little bit intensely to be a fan.

If nothing else, this guy I dated before he ended it because his friends told him that my alcohol tolerance was perpetuating his drinking problem* gave me a newfound appreciation for Oasis. He was a superfan, and while I don’t like things just because the person I’m dating likes them, I did have to fall asleep to Oasis on most nights for awhile there, and independent of his feelings, I realized that this was a good band and there was no shame in re-discovering them with real enthusiasm in my 20s.

My question to everyone is how could you not like Oasis? It’s one thing to dislike the genre and if that’s the case then I can’t fault you, but beyond that, if you’re a fan of rock music that’s good, what’s your argument? Oasis made great pop songs. Indisputably, empirically great. Okay, fine, lyrically, “Wonderwall” makes no sense and Liam Gallagher is a bitchy drunk whose only redeeming personal feature is hating Manchester United, but those songs. Noel Gallagher can write the fucking shit out of a song and nearly every one of them is pop fucking gold. Listen to the records. “Definitely Maybe” was a debut album. Like, are you serious? Granted the music industry has changed and bands aren’t nurtured or promoted that way anymore, but a debut album that good! COME ON.

One of the things people complain about is that Oasis clearly wanted to sound like the Beatles. Um, yeah? So? What’s wrong with wanting to sound like the Beatles? The Beatles defined great pop songs and, you know, bands, and in a way, every band that has ever come after the Beatles or been successful in any way whatsoever has wanted to sound like the Beatles. Period! And this is understandable! It’s fine! It’s the way of the universe and cannot be disputed or disrespected! I’m the first to admit that the Beatles are bad for a bar jukebox but brilliant and essential in just knowing about the existence of music, and ragging on Oasis for being a British band who were influenced by the Beatles is a pointless and silly argument.

Another dumb argument is that Liam and Noel Gallagher spend more time breaking up and pissing people off than they do making music. Again, who cares? Are you in Oasis? No? Okay, then their personal relationship has nothing to do with it. Liam is Brenda and Noel is Keith, and when they do get together to make music, it’s fucking great. Since when do bands have to be best friends to be any good?

It’s not just “Definitely Maybe” or “Morning Glory” that were good records, either.  Okay, so “Be Here Now” wasn’t terrific and they might have released more hits collections than original recordings, but “The Masterplan” and “Don’t Believe the Truth” were competent, progressive, and just fucking good albums, and I liked “Standing On the Shoulders of Giants” even though nobody else could decide on whether or not was any good, so it’s no wonder that their tracks get recycled into “best of” releases when the Gallaghers are too busy having fistfights in public to record anything new.

(If you agree with me on anything and think that maybe I know what I’m talking about when it comes to music, then I encourage you to check out Noel Gallagher’s High Flying Birds. I’m putting them on just about every playlist lately and Noel was always the better brother, anyway. You don’t have the feel as strongly about them as I do about Oasis, but they’re worth a few dozen listens on their own.)

But really, stop saying that listening to Oasis is uncool. Fuck you, you’re uncool. Go hide away with your vinyl and your pretension and unlistenable experimental everything, I’m busy blasting it apart with some unabashed pop glory and I don’t have any time to feel ashamed about it.

*This guy also gave me the understanding that anyone who tries to blame their problems on you – or worse, allows their friends to blame their problems on you – for something built into your genetic code is a fucktard asshat bitch, and you are much better off not speaking to them anymore.