Monthly Archives: September 2011

Koo Koo Ga Joob

Now that I’m LESS THAN ONE DAY from moving out of the ghetto, I feel that it’s time to ask a question of my current neighbors. The subject of this question has followed me from one shitty neighborhood to the … Continue reading

Posted in I Just Can't, Stuff I Didn't Know Before, WTF | 3 Comments

Procrastinating in Exile

If I haven’t been writing much lately, it’s because I’m practicing for spending my whole weekend without the Internet. Charter won’t be able to hook us up until Monday morning (and by Monday morning, I mean they’ll call us at … Continue reading

Posted in Uncategorized

Terlet Etiquette

Ladies and gentleman (but mostly the ladies, and you’ll see why in a minute), I’d like to inform you of a danger in the office. This danger poses a threat to the workplace’s most valuable asset – morale. Like other … Continue reading

Posted in Everyone Else Is An Idiot, I Just Can't, Paychecks Are Important, WTF | 6 Comments

PUT HIM IN A BODY BAG

My father is coming over tomorrow to help Graham and I take out the recycling. The city doesn’t think my block needs single stream recycling dumpsters. It prefers that we either throw our recyclable materials in with the regular trash … Continue reading

Posted in Everyone Else Is An Idiot, WTF | 1 Comment

Stress Shits Averted

I hope nobody wanted to do anything tonight because I am busy. I got the call from my new landlord (stress shits averted, dopamine flooding my brain!), set up some utilities, and am picking up the keys tomorrow. This means … Continue reading

Posted in I Heart | 2 Comments

Insanerer

Since Graham and I have such different schedules, on most days he’s falling asleep just as I’m waking up. I can’t fall asleep to the television and it would be cruel to make him lie awake in bed all night, … Continue reading

Posted in I Just Can't, Nerd It Up, WTF | 8 Comments

I Don’t Appreciate Your Ruse, Ma’am

Grandma Airplane is starting some shit. I’d already told management that she got combative or overly emotional any time she was confronted with a problem. I said this a year ago and instead of listening, the people I was talking … Continue reading

Posted in Everyone Else Is An Idiot, I Hate, I Just Can't, Paychecks Are Important, Writing, WTF | 4 Comments

Grace

My nephew plays soccer now. He’ll be five in December, which is actually a little old for most Catholic kids in South City to start playing. You’d think we were all immigrant kids or something, but it might be because … Continue reading

Posted in Nerd It Up, Playlists, The Pop Life

One Person’s Crazy

The other night, Graham and I were discussing how to share the utility bills at the new house. We decided that the gas, water, and sewer would be in my name (which may be an apt description for my life), … Continue reading

Posted in Nerd It Up, The Internet is My Boyfriend, WTF | 1 Comment

Frankly, My Dear, I Don’t Give a Damn

Hey, Famous Women! If you don’t want anyone to see your nude photos, stop taking them. It’s super easy. I don’t take them all the time and no one on the Internet knows what I look like when I step … Continue reading

Posted in Everyone Else Is An Idiot, The Pop Life, WTF | 1 Comment